DAY 82: Shooting Glocks, Magnums, Rugers, shotguns and stuff

21 Nov

Don't stand like this.

QUEENSLAND’s a law unto itself – like me, man – so naturally you can work your way through an arsenal of firearms at a shooting range without a licence.

At the Shooting Centre in Southport, my fellow bloodthirsty tourist and I buy over 100 rounds of ·22; 9mm; ·38 special; ·357; ·45 auto; ·44 Magnum.

My favourite’s the ·38 Special handgun – for the chamber-spinnin’ hijinks and Deer Hunter flashbacks – while the comrade’s obsessed with a Dirty Harry-style ·44 Magnum. We’re set through our paces by Roger, an affable chap who starts us on the wussy “ladies’” ·22, all the way up to a Glock. These firearms are way heavier and louder than anticipated – it’s hard not to flinch or kick out a foot when one goes off, even if it’s you pulling the trigger. But fuck, if Kate Ritchie and Rodger Corser can do it, so can I.


It’s the lever-action, 12-gauge shotgun Roger’s impatient to get to, though. It’s not included in our deal, but he’s dropped it into conversation three times now and is practically hopping from foot to foot when we start to consider the merits of letting one off.

Oh, all right then. I’ve wanted to fire a shotgun for ages, but even my fantasies have been accompanied by painful visions of the kickback cracking my collarbone in two. Roger admits he likes to advise people who are annoying him to hold the butt of the gun an inch away from their shoulder for optimum clavicle ouch.

“You only have to vaguely point a shotgun in the direction of something,” he says, as I faff around getting into place. “Because you’re definitely going to hit it.”

Sure enough, I pepper the target sheet with hundreds of holes after just one shot. The cartridge shoots out in front of my nose, with a pleasing puff of gunpowder. There are signs everywhere reminding punters to wash their hands and arms before leaving, as the residue of shooting leaves poisonous, powdered lead all over your limbs.

“Brought down the Roman Empire,” Roger notes. “Lead poisoning from saucepans.”

They made me wear these Protective Socks (slightly soiled).

Keeper? This gave me major ladywood.

3 Responses to “DAY 82: Shooting Glocks, Magnums, Rugers, shotguns and stuff”

  1. Hellcat666 November 23, 2010 at 10:10 pm #

    No fair, I want to do that! Can you get your licence at 14?!???!

  2. Michelle November 24, 2010 at 10:22 am #

    after seeing the state of cavill avenue on sunday, i understand why qld has suck lax gun laws. will let you know how i go with this one….woohoo!


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